22. AFTERWORD

For those who are still in good standing within the CofS, I would urge you to get auditor training (if you have not already done so) and to study the early tech with great vigor. Put aside any compulsive agreement with current CofS operating policies and begin to take responsibility yourself and evaluate things from your own sense of ethics and integrity.

If you see some diamonds in a pile of dung, you carefully pick them out and clean them off. You don't have to swallow the entire foul mess. And it would be foolish to pass up the diamonds. Although you might get in trouble, you will be far happier, and if you're really good and keep pushing and validating what is right in the orgs, you can get away with a lot of disagreement on the things that are really wrong.

I would hope that you will push for reforms, that you will object to abuses and outrageous prices, that you will present the subject honestly as a research line and an exploration into the uncharted regions of the human mind, that you will cease to shoot at squirrels and most of all I hope that you will begin to think for yourself.

For the freezone, I would encourage you to drop any fight or game condition with the CofS. Run out any bypassed charge or O/W on the orgs so that you can cleanly end cycle and turn your sights to higher goals. The real target is the vast amount of research that is still needed and you can't think clearly as long as you are busily trying to make Ron or the orgs wrong. I know that many of you had real cause for being upset, but you can't get anywhere as long as you keep wallowing in what has been done to you.

I would hope that you will indeed carry forward the research and that you will publish what you find. If you are worried about giving things away for free, remember that DMSMH was published as a complete technique that was intended for use at home and yet it resulted in a flood of people rushing into the early Dianetic Research Foundations. Unless you are only offering a sham and rip off, it does not protect your business to hide your discoveries.

I suppose it is the most ridiculous wishful thinking, but what I'd really like to see is the orgs delivering the well mapped out core technology to the masses and the freezone doing the leading edge of research and the two groups operating together with mutual respect and support.

For those who were once members and have abandoned it all and become complete anti-cultists, I'm sorry for you and I hope that what I wrote in the early parts of this series might give you some comfort and a better understanding of what was going on. Books such as "The Road To Xenu" (available on the internet) show the most horrible mis-application of the tech. Its no wonder that the author has turned against the subject. And yet one can see that the she had made some gains and then tossed the baby out with the bathwater (albeit a very tiny baby and a great deal of exceedingly dirty bathwater). Her only real hope would be to get into the freezone (and even there she needs to keep her eyes open and think for herself because some know what they are doing and some don't).

For those anti-cultists who were never involved in the subject and never even tried to understand, I really don't think you have a right to criticize the religious beliefs of others. On that basis, the only justified objections are those overts committed by the CofS which have crossed the line into the society at large. Demand that Scientology clean up its act, but leave the internals to people who have really immersed themselves in the subject.

And if you're going around feeling afraid of these dangerous culties, please notice that Scientologists are, in general, non-violent. The abuses of the RPF are only practiced by Sea Org members against each other, and even there they mainly work with restraining and controlling people rather than any direct violence. If they make an effort to overwhelm somebody, it is always an effort to overwhelm mentally rather than physically. So pull yourself together and be not afraid and you'll come through it alright.

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As for myself, I would like to see anything and everything that might help my own understanding and forward the research.

One big overlooked item among the confidential materials is the series of Saint Hill Staff Clearing tapes (the R6 tapes). There are about 28 of these and they are listed in the old tech volumes. These include "Pattern of the Bank" which is available on the internet, but most of them were not included in the modern R6 course and are unknown even to most Class VIII auditors. These tapes give the theory behind the R6 and Clearing courses. The first one is titled "Summary of R6 part 1" lecture SHSC-1A dated Dec 30, 1963.

For the loyalists, it would be nice if they would push to get the R&D series volumes done for the tapes of 1952 to 1954.

As for the freezone, I would expect that at least some of them have come up with additional processes, platens etc. and they also may have valuable experience and observations concerning the subject.

Maybe if we put together everything we've got, we might be in reach of the top.

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The first attempt to issue transcripts of all of Ron's tapes in the R&D volumes bogged down after issuing volume 10. The next volume (11 - never issued), would have contained the HCL lectures (March 1952) and have begun documenting what I consider to be Ron's "keyed-out OT" period. I assume that this was stalled because of arguments about what should or shouldn't be included, but I'm only guessing about this. Note that the HCL series contains the early research into NOTS among other things.

Then they went back and began redoing the R&D volumes again starting from number 1. The expressed reason was that the first version had been edited and altered. Offhand, I know of one little anecdote in the Dianetic Cassettes (some lectures from 1950 that were available on cassette for a brief time back around 1980) where he mentions going out drinking with somebody. This story (and probably others) were left out of the first version of the R&Ds for PR reasons. I have not sat down with the old and new R&D sets and whatever actual tapes I have to see if these things have all been corrected or whether even more is being edited out. The lectures of 1950 and 1951 would not contain anything which the CofS considered to be confidential and either series seems to be accurate as to technical materials.

In the new R&D series, they are squeezing more into each volume, so they covered the same material in 8 and 1/2 volumes that was covered in the entire 10 volumes of the first version. The first 10 HCL lectures are in the second half of new volume 9 and the rest along with the tech 80 lectures and the beginning of the tech 88 series are in new volume 10.

Note that they occasionally retitle a tape (usually with a better title - for example, HCL-6A "Question and Answer Period" was renamed "Whole Track Facsimiles"). Also, they do not use the old lecture numbering system or mention alternate titles and sometimes they put things under different headings (the last of the HCLs are under the heading "Lectures (Phoenix, Arizona)" in new R&D 10). Also, the old lecture titles were not always unique (there were 3 different lectures titled "Theta Bodies" that were given in March and April of 1952). Their adjustments are generally sensible, but they make it difficult to detect it when they leave tapes out of the volume because you don't see the gaps in the numbering.

I have not gone over it with a fine tooth comb, but the new R&D 10 does have a good bit of background material on NOTS and they seem to have faithfully transcribed the lectures that they did choose to include. But they completely omitted quite a few lectures and they don't mention that they did this.

A 69 page almost complete list of 2910 taped lectures was issued as Flag Info Letter number 148 dated 18 April 1978. Based on this, I have compiled a list of the tapes omitted from R&D 10.

Those tapes marked with a "*" were available on reels until recent times (they are in Pubs catalogue #5). Those marked with a "**" used to be available on reels (they were in Pubs catalogue #4) and were declared to be confidential and made unavailable when NOTS was released. Those tapes marked with a "***" were at one time offered by Golden Era as part of an outrageously expensive "complete" run of all the unavailable tapes that they had in their archives which they were offering to rich Scientologists (I believe that this project was canceled well before they ran all the tapes that appeared on their list - there were over a thousand tapes that they were going to produce).

So here is the list of what's missing from new Volume 10 (HCL and the immediately following related lectures in Phoenix):

* HCL-16 10 Mar 52 The anatomy of Fac One (continue demo)

* HCL-18 10 Mar 52 Entities (Demo continued)

** HCL-23 .. Mar 52 Theta Bodies

*** HCL-23A 22 Mar 52 Impulses of a Thetan

*** HCL-24A .. Mar 52 Theta Bodies

* HCL-25 25 Mar 52 An analysis of memory, part I

* HCL-26 25 Mar 52 An analysis of memory, part II

** HCL-Spec . Apr 52 Electrpsychometric Scouting - Battle of the universes (Mary Sue audits LRH)

--- 15 Apr 52 Demo and brief explanation (whole track and bodies in pawn)

*** --- 16 Apr 52 Anatomy of the theta body

*** --- 20 Apr 52 The goals and purposes of Theta and Mest

--- 6 May 62 Anatomy of Thought (no copy in archives).

Of these 12, only the last one is marked on the flag info letter as being missing from the archives (no copy available) and only one other one was omitted from Golden Era's special project (possibly because their only copy was too poor to reproduce).

Note that there is also a lecture missing from the tech 80 lectures, both in the cassette series and in the R&D 10 transcripts. It is titled "Early methods of dealing with people, entities" and is the second lecture given on 20 May 1952.

Note that I was careful to account for every lecture that was included in R&D 9 and 10 to eliminate the problems of retitling or shifting a lecture in sequence because the exact date had been determined.

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The picture I have put together so far is, unfortunately, quite confusing. There are so many different factors. There is no single answer. If there were, then somebody would occasionally stumble on it and turn into a god.

The truth of the matter is that no single factor could keep you down. You might sink briefly, but then you would rebound. Any aberration or limitation that has a serious impact on you or persists for a significant period of time will have many reasons behind it. Otherwise it would be no more than a shadow which only touched you briefly.

The things that devastate you are always the last straw rather than the entire weight. The things that release you and let you rise towards freedom are also straws which, once removed, shift the balance enough to let you rise under the weight of what remains. And if you rise high enough, perhaps you can shrug off the rest.

There is a good side to this. You don't have to find the one and only exactly correct reason behind a a particular aberration to get rid of it. There might be a dozen reasons, all valid, and you can often blow it (at least temporarily) on any one of them. And if one isn't enough, then two or three might do it. This does leave you a bit unstable because those other reasons can get stirred up, but if you keep moving forward, you can undercut the whole mess before this catches up with you. So the real target is to gain horsepower rather than handle each little thing in an excessively thorough manner. You can always reopen an area and do a bit more if it seems needed.

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This is hardly more than a beginning. The road out is long. But as soon as you really begin to expand and have some wins, the trip becomes pleasant.

Its only the stops and failures that make the trip out seem arduous.

It was at one time said "if it isn't fun, it isn't Scientology". That is basically correct. Although there is hard work involved, hard work is fun when it is interesting and productive and your strength and abilities are increasing.

When it hasn't been fun, when it has resulted in misery and despair, it has been due to the subject itself going off the rails, whether due to misapplication or to real errors in tech or policy.

Of course there are momentary stops and barriers that have to be pushed through. But the fun is there on the other side.

And if this isn't the case, then maybe its time to find out what's wrong and fix it.

It really is a "feel good" kind of subject. But its not just a surface feeling. Its the deep good feeling that comes from becoming more knowledgeable, and more able, and more aware.

For a parting thought, I will leave you with one of the underlying basics of metaphysics. It has been said by Bob Heinline, the science fiction writer, and by Alexander Scriabin, the mystic composer, and by endless other great minds stretching down through time.

"Thou Art God".

Its time you woke up and took responsibility for your creations.